bjciii: My twisted thoughts

Before I begin, I gotta say… I’m developing quite a crush on Zoë Bell. If you don’t know who this bad-ass bitch is, check it:

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, ya ever wonder what happens after the movie / television show / book / play ends? I wonder about that all the damned time. When I was in high school, we did a production called Into the Woods which is based on what happens after the prince gets the princess and they live “happily” ever after. Interesting concept, but I really fucking hated that play by the end of the run… and I was only on the stage crew! Of course, we got to twist the heads of the actors during the production, so that was pretty fun, but I really hated the play.

It just struck me about this because I was watching a movie where a few women “borrow” a car for a test drive, end up smashing it all to hell, and then, most likely, have to return it. Imagine you were the dumbass who loaned his car to these women!

Not a long entry, but a thought-provoking one. Any movies or television shows you all have given a thought to “after the credits” when you watched it?

I worked with a friend of mine tonight and we had several discussions about many topics, but one of the talking points was if the pain after loss erased all of the good moments. Basically, were the good times worth the hurt?

She said “no” because she felt that the end changed her in a fundamental way; it tortured her and made her unable to trust anyone. Basically, she let the bad end (and, let’s face it campers… if it doesn’t end badly, chances are that it wouldn’t end. Think about that for a second… Much like the saying “it’s always in the last place you look,” “it ended badly” is just as horribly simple. Of course it’s the in the last place you look! If you find it, why would you keep looking? Of course it ended badly! Would you wake up one morning and say “Hey… I know we are having a real good thing right now, but I’m feeling like it can’t get any better than this, so let’s end it on a high note. Whaddya say?”) completely erase everything good that she experienced during that time.

I guess I fall into the other category… I think it hurts more to think of the good times, but I can’t let the end overshadow the great moments. Sure, it’s bad when it ends, but there were a lot of incredible times. Were the good times worth all of this anguish? You bet. I wish to God I didn’t feel it, but I wouldn’t trade the past 15 months for anything in the world.

See… we’re a fragile species. Yes, people can die from broken hearts, but most of the time, we heal and move on. If we have our heart broken (whether it’s by a lover, a friend, a death, a supreme disappointment, or anything else) and lock it away, never to be touched again, we aren’t really living. We exist, sure. We breathe and move and sleep and meander through a world that is more muted than it should be, but we are sure as hell not living. To live is to love. To love is to experience loss. To lose means to hurt. Keeping all of that in mind: To live is to hurt. We learn through pain. I’m not talking physical pain (although those of you who enjoy having that sort of thing: more power to ya. Not my bag!), but think of all of the great artistic achievements which came from some poor sap being lonely. Poems, stories, novels, movies, television, music, sculptures, paintings… anything! We understand the human condition better through the anguish of loss. It’s a sick, perverted thing, but I dare you to prove me wrong.

The only constant in this life, my friends, is that there is an end to everything. The joke is that the only sure things are death and taxes, but you don’t have to pay your taxes. You don’t have to stop at that red light. You don’t have to pay for that six-pack. These are arbitrary rules that, as “civilized society” dictates, we follow on an every day basis for fear of our world descending into anarchy. We don’t have to follow these rules, but we do because it’s expected of us, and we expect it of others. Everyone, however, whether criminal or saint, experiences death. I’m not being morbid, but I’m saying that death represents an end. I don’t know about you (whoever is reading this right now), but I plan on having many endings before I die (hopefully of old age and “natural” causes). I know that not all of them will be on my terms and I know that not all of them will be easy to swallow, but every one of them will help me understand my life a little better.

Was it worth it? You bet your ass it was, and no one will ever hear me say otherwise.

Over the last week, there’s been a lot of drama. Actually, it’s been more than just this last week, but it’s come to a head since then. Honestly, it’s been building for a while, so, now that everything’s out in the open, it’s time to talk about it.

That’s right folks: Brett Favre is being a punkass bitch.

Brett has been the Green Bay Packers quarterback since 1992 (he played in 1991, but in Atlanta where he threw 4 regular-season passes, having no completions and 1 interception… which was promptly returned for a touchdown), and that means he’s been at the helm of one of the most storied franchises in NFL history for 16 seasons. He won 3 MVP awards (consecutively) and 2 Super Bowls. He also started every game for The Pack from September 20, 1992 until January 20, 2008 (that’s 253 regular season games… 275 including the playoffs). So, when we talk about Brett Favre, we talk about someone who has earned the respect he’s gained until this point. He’s a warrior and a winner.

Keeping all of that in mind, however, we have to say that the man is 39 years old this year and has talked about retirement for a few years now. He finally announced he would retire this past season, so everyone made plans to move forward. Now, he has announced he wants to “un-retire” and come back to The Pack to play at least another season.

Can he do it? Probably; he IS Brett Favre, after all. Should he do it? I don’t think so. Not only that, but the Pack’s backup QB, Aaron Rodgers, has been studying and preparing all spring and summer for the first game of his Green Bay career as full-time starter. This guy has been holding the clipboard for a little while, hoping that Favre would finally retire so he could get a few primetime snaps in, now it happens, but the rug is pulled back out from him?

Rodgers must feel like shit.

Think of it this way… The CW is airing a new retread of a proven show from FOX back in the 1990s: Beverly Hills 90210. They have announced a ton of the regular cast, and every one of those cast members have to consistently deal with the spectre of previous and well-known characters from the original show. Every interview, it’s all about Brenda, Brandon, Steve, Andrea, Dylan, David, Donna, and Kelly. Here are these actors and actresses hoping for a fraction of the success that the earlier show had, and they have to deal with all of the questions about how they will live up to or destroy the legacy of the previous show. They have to be better and smarter than their predecessors, but there’s a new wrinkle: 3 of the original cast members are returning on a sporadic basis.

That’s right, folks: Aaron Rodgers is to The CW’s 90210 as Brett Favre is to FOX’s Beverly Hills 90210. The next generation is there, preparing, ready, and willing to move forward, but the shadow of the past looms and threatens to, well… overshadow the coming accomplishments.

I know, I know… it takes a real talent to compare a backup quarterback taking the reins of a historical franchise from a QB who just can’t let go to a brand-new television show which is digging up the corpse of an older show to feast on the scraps it leaves behind. I’m good that way.

I feel bad for Rodgers; I do. I could care less about Green Bay as a team because I’m an Eagles boy, but when you get drafted, promised the lead position after the current guy leaves, and you have that ball placed into your hands only to have it ripped away? Not cool. If Favre comes back, I truly believe he’s going to tarnish his reputation. Even Michael Jordan’s last comeback was a failure, so there are some instances when it really is time to say goodbye to the thing you love the most. If you try and recapture the glory after the glory days are done, it’s all about memory instead of making new memories.

In any case, I’m just looking to see how this all shakes out. Will Green Bay take Favre back? Will Favre get his release and play somewhere else? Will 90210 be a semi-decent show? It’s all about unknowns at this point. Then again, that’s half the fun

So… the experiment is over; the movies are done. I have a ton of others to watch, but I’m not really in the mood right now. I guess I’m just suffering through another July. I gotta say… I’m not a huge fan of this month. Maybe, when I was a kid, it represented freedom from school, fireworks, and all the pool-time I could possibly want. Now? It’s hot, humid, and represents more loss than I really want to think about.

Yes, folks: Fuck July. Fuck it right in its brown heinie-hole.

Other than that bright spot, I guess life could be worse: it could be NOT having life. Good movies coming out into the theatres, school seems to be going well, and my sister is in good health. Everyone else seems to be having a banner summer, so kudos to you-dos.

I’m not quite sure of what else to say right now. There’s a lot going on, but nothing I want to talk about, so I guess it’s hasta la vista.