bjciii: My twisted thoughts

By the by… the nipples I was referring to in yesterday’s post were the coax nipples on the back of a cable box, so don’t get all that excited okay?

2004 is coming to a close in about 15.5 hours from the time I am typing this (at least on the East coast of The United States) and it wasn’t all that bad a year. Yeah, I got screwed over (again) and I had yet another surgery, but I’m healthy and (for the most part) happy. Everyone I love most is still around and I know who my best friends are as opposed to those hangers-on. I’d like to think I’ve learned how to control myself a little better, but it’s only baby-steps. I guess that’s better than nothing huh? So what did 2004 mean to me? It meant:

• Nipplegate
• Semicolon
• Fiber!
• A cool head overcomes a bad situation
• A bad situation doesn’t always get discovered until months later
• Decks = Bad… Patios = GOOD
• Well hell… Phile’s a dog-person after all!
• Friends who don’t take the time to say hi aren’t all that wonderful of friends.
• I’m honored and proud to be an American.
• E-Mail is truly an addicting invention.
• Revisiting the past isn’t always bad… but it isn’t always good either.
• My parents are truly the greatest.
• My sister is truly the greatest.
• My dog, well shit, there’s no comparison.
• Family can annoy the hell out of you, but they’re still family.
• Black-Widows don’t always have 8 legs.
• Michael Moore is a hypocritical bastard who preyed on the concerns of normal people to make money.
• DVDs are my kryptonite.
• The Red-Sox!!!
• Joss Whedon is still a god among writers.
• Andrew, Steve, and France are the tabasco.
• VH-1 has definitely blown past MTV… but both Pimp My Ride & Viva La Bam are guilty pleasures.
• I voted for George Bush against my vindictive nature. I really don’t LIKE George Bush… but I thought he would do a better job than Kerry.
• Comcast sucks.
• People are completely anal.
• My company actually reads my blog!! W007!! I’m (in)famous!!
• I call the people who can’t drive “Everyone but me.”
• Mongoose pushes me to be a better web-guy.
• Never take sight or hearing for granted… there’s nothing like reading a book while listening to music.
• The good foods taste bad and the bad foods taste good.
• I’m proud of my cousin Eric and I pray with all my soul that he comes back from Iraq before next Christmas.

So be safe, be happy, and remember: Your job does not define you… you define your job. This world is too big and wonderful to be identified by your job-title; get out there and explore it.

I had this long post about how much Comcast sucks as a Cable company and how I was happy to have made it to 5 years owning my own home, but I was stupid and closed the window accidentally. I’ll be damned if I’m typing everything in again, so here’s a summary:

1. Comcast charges suck. $18.25 to install a cable-box? I think not.
2. I’ve been a grown-up for 5 years now. Scary, but true.
3. My parents are wonderful and I couldn’t ask for anything better.
4. Brian and his wife would be awfully weird living in my second bedroom after 2 years of marriage.

That pretty much covers my previous post. If it makes no sense, I’m truly sorry but, like I said, I am NOT typing everything in again. There was a lot of “nipple” talk too…

Anyway… I’m outta here like Vladimir (which, incidentally, is Russian for William). Peace.

Miss me? Sorry I’ve been gone so long, but I took a 4-day weekend and it was rather nice. Of course Saturday (Christmas) I spent with my family. Sunday I ran about and and took care of some errands and then spent the rest of the day cleaning the top floor of the house. It’s funny how much time you can spend reorganizing things and cleaning when the normal person will walk in and wonder why it took you 6 hours to accomplish. Still, it’s satisfying. Monday I stretched myself really thin since I packed all my meetings into that day while I was off. Still, I got everything done and managed to only miss about 3 minutes of the Eagles game that night. Shame they lost, but it’s not a REAL loss since our starters (well… some of them… the others never even suited up!) only played for a series. It was nice watching the game with Dad. Mom, being the HUGE football fan she is (that’s an example of sarcasm folks), was comfortably in her bed watching some show or another. To each their own!

I don’t wish to make light of the tsunami / earthquake catastrophe in Asia, but I have heard probably just as many people mispronounce “tsunami” as they have found bodies. It’s “sue-NAH-me” people. It’s not “tuh-snah-me” or “tuh-sue-nah-me” or (my personal favorite) “tush-nah-me.” I think it was a vocab word back in grade-school, or maybe I just read about it as a kid. I can’t remember… but I do remember those little vocabulary books. You know, the half-size books with the fat pencil on the cover? It was pretty cool. I am a geek, there’s no denying that, but I loved vocab. I always felt that the more words you know, the smarter you sounded and the less people would ignore you. Now I just get railed for using large words. Go figure. People are never happy.

New Year’s Eve is fast approaching and it means there is another reason to go out, drink, and have fun. Of course I’m probably skipping the festivities this year. I might just curl up on my couch and read. I’ve been invited to a party, but I’m not too keen on going. It’s not for the company though… the guys that are gonna be there are great friends. Who knows? I always found that the most fun NYE plans are made with hours to spare. One thing is for certain, I really don’t want to be out in a bar at midnight. Too many people!

Oh well… I guess it’s time to get back to answering the couple dozen e-mails I have here. They love me; they really do love me. Hopefully everyone had a great Christmas and will have a safe New Year’s Eve, but I’m sure I’ll post another entry before that. Just in case I get busy though, be good!

Christmas Eve and, yeah, I’m at work. Don’t cry for me Argentina… I chose to be here. See, since Christmas is on the weekend, we took our Christmas holiday day on either Friday or Monday. Most everyone would choose Christmas Eve which is why I chose today to work and take off Monday. No one will be working today so, therefore, no calls coming in. See? A method to my madness. Luckily I also had a comp-day in reserve, so I’m taking that next Tuesday so I’m secured a 4 day weekend. Mmm… 4-day weekends.

So let’s get serious here. It’s Christmas and that means Christian religious orders are preparing to celebrate the birth of Christ. It is a cliched and hackneyed statement to say “Jesus is the reason for the season,” but he is. Without the early Church designating 12/25 as Christ’s date of birth, December would be known for New Year’s Eve. The season is all about joy people… it’s about preparing, in your heart, a place for Christ and his love. Don’t think I’m this over-board neo-religious jackass because I’m not, but I still understand that Christmas isn’t about who bought the most lavish presents or how many parties can you attend. No, it’s about how many people can you make smile with a kind word or deed. How many lives can you touch with a simple act of kindness? Yeah… I bought lots of presents this year, but I think my most important gifts were my Christmas cards. They were just regular old cards I bought at Happy Harry’s in Wilmington, but I wrote something individual in each one. I’d like to think, upon opening the card, people saw and thought “He cared enough to send a card.” I hope that brought a smile to their face and made them feel loved. That’s my wish for everyone: To feel like they aren’t alone regardless of the circumstances.

So I’m gonna close with one of the greatest scenes in any Christmas special or movie:

Charlie Brown: …can anyone tell me what Christmas is all about?
Linus: I can Charlie Brown. (pause) Lights please?

And there were in the same country
shepherds abiding in the field,
keeping watch over their flock by night.
And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them,
and the glory of the Lord shone round about them:
and they were sore afraid.
And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold,
I bring you good tidings of great joy,
which shall be to all people.
For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour,
which is Christ the Lord.
And this shall be a sign unto you;
Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes,
lying in a manger.
And suddenly there was with the angel
a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace, good will toward men.

That’s what’s Christmas is all about Charlie Brown.

So how the heck are ya? Sorry it’s been a few days… I know how much my life and its stories mean to you. In case you’re wondering, yeah… that was sarcasm. Just felt the need to point that out.

I am proud to report that I am now perfectly done my Christmas shopping. Whew! I think this is the latest I’ve ever been shopping and it’s not fun. I walked into Target about a week ago, walked around for 10 minutes and then got disgusted with the sheer volume of pushy people, so I shoved my cart into a corner and walked out. I then went to Barnes & Noble and did 90% of my shopping there. Mmm… literacy for Christmas. Gotta love it.

I think I might have upset someone yesterday and I’m feeling bad about it, but thanks to Wade, I don’t doubt my decision any more. I have this real problem with empathy… I have too much. I’d like just to make decisions with impunity, but it don’t work with me. That sucks. Oh well… better to hurt now without any time than to be hurt later after a long time. Get it, got it, good.

Oh yeah… Susan recommended I try eHarmony.com because it’s working for her. I then talked to my beautiful cousin Kat who told me that her buddies said it sucked and to try Match.com simply for the laughs. I think I’m just going to stick to real life dating… Internet dating still scares me too much. There’s too many needy people out there who are looking for a quick fix. I don’t want to think about serious relationships before I lay eyes on the person ya know? And people said *I* was a romantic fool!!! Eesh… at least I won’t compromise myself anymore (and that is NOT a knock against anyone in particular lest you get pouty and think so).

So I promised mongoose that I would have bjciii.com up and running on 1/1/2005 and I’m still aiming for that one. Don’t worry… you’ll all see it and be happy. I love HTML. If I can’t have my dream job of beeing a DJ at a rock station, then at least I can write web-pages right? Now if I could only get that bonus everyone else seems to be getting this holiday season…

Yeah… I’m on my way out, but I just had to drop in and say hello. I ran spot again today for “Scrooge” and it was good. Place was absolutely packed though. Only 2 more shows left if you wanna see it!

Got my buddy Xmas party tonight. It’s my “clique” from when I was growing up (and their spouses), so this should be fun. I made Grape Chili Meatballs and holy shit!! They’re spicier than hell. I hope I can convince other people to eat them or I’m gonna be disappointed that I fucked the recipie up. I think I used a hotter chili sauce than I should have. Who knows.

Anyway, I’m off to get ready. Just wanted to drop by and say hello. I’m going to miss my first Eagles game since I can remember tomorrow due to the play, so I’m hoping Drew will keep text messages flowing my way during the show. God I hope this scores me points while I roast in hell!!!

For whatever reason, people were having problems with the images on the previous design scrolling funny when they scrolled down the page. I decided to download this style because I like it. Hopefully it doesn’t act up like the old one… Steve? I’m relying on you to be my tester.

If I could write an entire post in Latin, I would. Unfortunately (and no offense to Mr. Chew), I forgot 95% of everything I learned in Latin at St. Edmond’s. I remember my full-name, some numbers, and (if I really try) The Lord’s Prayer, but nothing else. I do know certain phrases though… like Quando Omni Flunkus Moritati. Of course I didn’t learn that at St. Edmond’s Academy for Boys! It’s not a bad quote, but a funny life lesson. Apparently it’s also offensive. Go figure. umm… never mind… It kinda ties in with an e-mail conversation I had last night with someone who wrote “Merry Holidays” to me:

(from me)
Merry Holidays?? I ain’t no heathen. It’s a Merry Christmas damnit.

(from them)
…”Merry Christmas.” I am oh so sick of being pc nowadays but if you say’Merry Christmas” you offend someone… people just seem to forget the TRUE meaning of the season…

(from me)
Fuck the PC Nazis… Say Merry Christmas because if it weren’t for Christ, no one would give a shit about December anyway. Hanukkah is a MINOR Jewish holiday and Kwaanza is made-up anyway.
Merry CHRISTmas!!

(from them)
Damn-tell me how you REALLY feel

I am so sick and tired of having to censor everything I say because someone is so sensitive. I am a good guy, one of the better ones if my friends can be believed, and I don’t ever set out to intentionally hurt someone. I’m open-minded about things when someone wants a dialogue, but I’ll shut that avenue real damn quick if I’m being threatened with idiocy. A school wants to ban “Silent Night” from their Christmas concert because a Jewish family in the school complained. Real fucking easy solution: The Jewish kid doesn’t participate in the Christmas concert! Don’t homoginize the holiday for the PC crowd! Do you think the Synagogue will refrain from singing one of the traditional Jewish songs because a Catholic is in their midst? I don’t think so.

As for the Kwaanza quote above… I was angry and know nothing about the holiday, so if I did offend anyone who celebrates that, I am truly sorry. There is NO excuse to belittle someone’s belief structure when they can back it up, but Kwaanza only rose to social prominence in the mainstream about 10 years ago if I remember right. For me, that’s made-up. For my kids, it’s gonna be a normal holiday. I’m sure society felt the same way when the Church instituted Christmas all those centuries ago. The date was picked because it corresponded with a Pagan holiday and the pope felt it would be easier to convert the pagans to Christianity if we had same holidays.

Anyway… I’m sure there’s no doubt where I stand on the subject. They call this “The Holiday Season” because of the three holidays celebrated in it, but I’m not Jewish or whatever denomination celebrates Kwaanza, so Merry Christmas to all. My… what a fun post to start the day huh?

When *I* start to say it’s cold, then damnit… it’s cold! It was in the teens this morning as I left the house and it sure felt like it. Wow! Looks like I have to actually turn the heat on now. So it’s Wednesday and there’s 10 days left until Christmas. I’m looking forward to it because, once you strip away all of the commercialism, Christmas is still one of my favorite holidays due to the togetherness. I have this ritual… I go to work on The Eve and spend some time with all my co-workers that day; we really don’t get anything done because… IT’S CHRISTMAS EVE! Minor problems get fixed and anything pressing, but I doubt anyone takes on any extra work that day. Hopefully we are let out early and I run home to grab a shower and get changed. I then spend about 90 minutes to 2 hours at The Wilmington Wine Company for our Christmas party there. We exchange gifts and drink some champagne and get out of there early. After that I head to my grandmother’s house for the Christmas Eve party for my mom’s side of the family. We’ve been doing this since I can remember and I love it. Good food, good family, good times. I’m getting psyched. This year we’ll be doing 10 o’clock mass at St. Joseph’s on the Brandywine. We used to do the children’s mass when I was younger and then we did Midnight Mass for a while, but everyone’s getting too old to stay up that late. I like to be in by early damnit! I think 10 will work fine.

Christmas morning we wake up (I spend the night at my parents’ house that night) and we do the gift thing, welcome friends and family, and then head to The Bestes for the mother of all Christmas Brunches. Some of the best food is there… mmm… After that we just sit around the house, welcome more visitors, read any instruction booklets and watch A Christmas Story about 10 times before I pack up and go home that night. That’s my holiday ritual. This year I have off on the 27th AND 28th, so I’m extra psyched this year. I love being out of the office; it’s so relaxing.

So spill… what does everyone else do for ritual on Christmas Eve/Day? Hopefully I’ll get that large-breasted nymphomaniac redheaded female that I’ve been hoping for all year. Hey! I’ve been good…

Got my letters in the mail yesterday afternoon. Turns out I qualified for one and am ranked 15th but I failed the other… by 0.05%. I’m pretty happy though. You think with all the entrants, I’m 15th in one and failed to qualify by 5 hundreths of a percentage point in the other… something I wasn’t even expecting to do THAT well in. So yeah… I was a little depressed about the results, but also very encouraged by those same results after the initial “damn” left the building. I figure that I’ll do better next time!!!

Other than that, there’s really not much new. I’m busting my ass as usual at work and I’m working on a bunch of small projects while keeping on top of a larger one. I’m lucky to have some great friends here that keep me sane. Then again, I’m lucky to have a lot of great friends in different facets of life!

Speaking of friends… I’m going with 3 of ‘em tonight to Theology on Tap at Catherine Rooney’s. Should be interesting knowing this group. I hope we don’t get kicked out…

I got back to the house in time to catch most of A Charlie Brown Christmas. Everyone has seen that special, so I won’t go into details about it, but if you remember the whole “That’s what Christmas is all about Charlie Brown” speech that Linus gives… well that was the impetus for this little rant.

This special was made in 1965; that’s almost 40 years ago when PC meant nothing. There were no “Personal Computers” or “Political Correctness” bullshit out there, so PC was meaningless. Back then it was all about morality and Christian behaviour… yeah we started hitting the hippie age, JFK was just assassinated, and Vietnam really snapped a lot of people out of their 50s-induced happy-comas, but still: The family unit was strong at that time. That special showed how, in the commercialism of the holiday, the reason for celebrating was still The Birth of Christ. Do you, in all honesty, think that any network would allow that special to be made now? Let’s face it… the only reason it still is aired is because it’s THE Classic Christmas special. If it never existed before this year, the ACLU and many other piece-of-shit mind-control organizations would say that it disinfranchised a majority of the public who didn’t believe in Christ or celebrate Christmas. They would complain about the finale of “Hark The Herald Angels Sing” because it’s a Christian hymn. Fraud psychologists like Doctor Phil would decry the portrayal of Charlie Brown as a sad case of repeated peer-abuse and the victim of no parenting. You may be smiling right now, but if you stop and think about it: Am I wrong?

Look at this sobering fact: 99.8% of all complaints logged by the FCC during the calendar year of 2003 were filed by a right-wing, Nazi-esque organization called “The Parents Television Council.” These people have deemed television to be unfit for YOU and YOUR family. Who the fuck gave them that right? In 2003, 240,000 complaints were logged. 240,000… that’s a lot more than the 14,000 in 2002. If you take 99.8% of that large number, the PTC was responsible for 239,520. That means that 480 complaints came from another source.

Keeping that in mind, is it that inconceivable that Charlie Brown’s special would be “offensive” to people now in this bastion of Political Correctness? I think it’s the greatest Christmas special ever made and it shows exactly why Christians SHOULD celebrate the holiday. Unfortunately the FCC is a spineless organization that listens to the squawkers more than the public and they try to appease a minority group such as the PTC that has the complaint number on speed-dial everytime Jerry Springer is on. It’s a shame that we are heading for a sanitary world where everything is so damn homoginized that differences won’t exist anymore. Humanity’s strength is in its diversity, yet if L. Brent Bozell and his PTC Shock-Troops have their way, we’re all going to be the exact same robot.